The True Confessions of a Crabmommy

The Mahendra Watch Project (an underfunded non-governmental organisation) would like to extend a warm welcome to Crabmommy, who is now sorted with 'Tomu. Crabmommy specializes in 'keepin' it real' where motherhood is concerned, resisting designer-mother consumerism (well, she can't afford it) and telling it like it is. This includes facing the dangers of bears and loons in the wide open spaces of Wyoming, turning motherhood into something David Lynch might want to film.

Here is an extract from her early posts:

A few years ago, my dream was to find a swell and rampantly appealing on all fronts man, mate with him and produce a spawn. All happened. After innumerable misfirings and datings of the wrong sort (alcoholic carpenters and schizophrenic actors always come to mind), I finally met the man on the subway in New York City, went out with him for a year and half, and promptly got knocked up. Even though the baby was unplanned, said swell and rampantly appealing on all fronts man (seriously, the best possible guy) ponied up the support, physical, emotional, financial. We got married: I had a fetching frock; we had a party involving marzipan and cherry blossoms and friends...

Her dream comes true, in other words. Yet, in still other words:

We have it blissfully bloody lucky and obviously I know it. So why am I constructing a blog entirely devoted to bitching? Because it is in my nature to crane my neck during such moments and wonder what is on the other side of the abyss that is new parenthood. The lack of money, time; the plethora of tedious moments that in fact comprise an equal if not bulk portion of motherhood...these lead my mind off in wandering directions, making me eager to dish dirt and get a sour taste in the mouth. All that sticky sweetness, the insufferable candy-floss cloud that collects around moms, moms individually, moms in groups, nobody says anything really outrageous (at least not here where we live, a vale of wealth and health and optimism).

And so we start off on the trials and tribulations of being a crabmommy. Read it and laugh until you weep and schmaak it.

She also now has a column at Cookie Magazine, a mag for moms (and dads), where she continues to rail against the cloying sweetness of mommyhood as propagated by, erm, well, Mommy mags.